We would love to have your prayers this week and on ward.
One of our 1st year students died/found dead yesterday. There is a possiblity that her death might be suicide. It's hard to gauge where people are at with the whole situtation. Pray for wisdom. Pray for compassion. Pray for gentleness from the Christians on campus.
Thank you
nnena
Thursday, January 31, 2008
Sunday, December 02, 2007
Finding Common Ground
Hello all. I found an article that we all probably need to read. It's an interview with Bono. (Bono, as some of you may know, is the lead singer of a little-known Irish group called U2). Pretty cool stuff. It's important to note that the guy interviewing him is an atheist:
http://www.christianitytoday.com/music/interviews/2005/bono-0805.html
Just thought it was a cool example of someone finding a way to express the truth of Jesus in a way his audience could understand.
http://www.christianitytoday.com/music/interviews/2005/bono-0805.html
Just thought it was a cool example of someone finding a way to express the truth of Jesus in a way his audience could understand.
Saturday, November 17, 2007
Kids say the durnest things
Because God has a sense of drama... or humor... he has a knack for letting life play out the conversations you are having with a friend. Earlier this week i was texting back and forth with a friend of mine about some life stuff. Such as when God says no and the disappoint hurts... Well while I and this friend were texting I had the two little boys (age 3 and 2) with me. And at the time of the texting I and the oldest were having a bit of a struggle of wills... the whole time it was going on I was struck with the thought of how much my life and the conversation mirrored dean's actions. And below is the e-mail that came from the struggle.
*********
I had taken dean and elliot to the Indian burial mounds for a walk. We first stopped off at a smaller a set of mounds near the entrance of the park. After we went there I told the boys that I have another place that I wanted to take them. You see another part of the park was so cool and had an old lake that was slowly growing in with plants… there were cranes and other cool birds there. So we loaded up into the car and drove to the other side of the park. We got out of the car and started to walk up a set of stairs leading to the lake and other mounds. As we walked up the stairs we got to a point where we could continue to go up the mound or turn left and go down the mound to the lake. I started down the stairs towards the lake and called Dean to follow me.
“No Nnena. I want to go up the mound.”
“But Dean you have already been up a mound before I want to show you something new.”
“NO NNENA!”
“I don’t want to go there! You follow ME! YOU go where I am going!”
Really little boy? I am suppossed to follow you? Really? He was so frustrated and nothing I could tell him would get him to understand that I had another, cooler place to show him. And the place that he wanted to go was the same but I had something new, a new adventure.
“No dean we are going this way I want to show you something.” Dean started to pitch a fit.
“No I don’t want to. I don’t want to.”
“Dean follow me.”
And elliot and I started down the path heading to the water. The same water that dean earlier wanted to go to that had the cool birds and all sort of stuff. Dean reluctantly followed us. I had so much more for Dean to see… and Dean simply wanted to go up the mound. And not that it was wrong but there was so much more that I wanted him to see. I knew that it was cool around the lake and I wanted dean to see it. We would eventually go up the mound. And I even told Dean this… we will eventually go up the mound but just follow me, come see this, I promise we will go back.
So he followed. Dragging his heels. Actually he was almost a 100 yards behind me. And then elliot and I discovered a cool hole where snakes might have lived. (Looking back I am glad no snakes lived in the hole) And we started playing with it…. and dean slowly started following us. And then a huge white crane flew off and dean stood watching the bird.
“Look nnena look.”
“I see it dean.”
And then he came over to join us and played in the hole. And then we started walking around the lake the same lake that he would not come to earlier because he wanted to go up the mound.
And we started having all sort of adventures. Something was following us in the bushes…oh my goodness! :) And we went stomping about and gradually Dean forgot that he wanted to go up the mound. Finally it was time to start heading back.
“Ok dean do you want to climb up the mound. Yes? Ok let’s go.” And I let him race ahead of me and he climbed to the top of the mound while elliot and I followed. We got to the top and could see everything, the city, the lake we were walking around and it was wonderful and glorious and yeah great.
Dean didn’t trust me… but finally curiosity brought him to see what I was doing. And then he followed me. As everything was going on I started thinking in my head about our conversation… actually a lot of texts took place during the struggle between Dean and me. And I couldn’t help but see the similarities. Dean had what he wanted, a desire, but I wanted to show him something else something more. I guess that is where the faith is… do I really believe that you have something more for me God? Some thing better and good. Recently the idea that God has been tossing around this week is his sovereignty. Sara e-mailed me yesterday about how awesome and comforting it was that he is sovereign… and the thing we talked about that the God who loves us is sovereign and in control. And he is a loving Father who sees more than we see. That doesn’t stop us from being frustrated or hurt when he thwarts our desire… but do I believe him to still be good? And if I do what does that mean about the events surrounding me, the no’s that hurt. The people that reject… is that somehow good too?
The hardest thing about my walk has been trusting God with my heart… what if He disappoints me? I am always impressed with people who trust God and get hurt but at least try. At least you try…and I think there is faith in that.
*****
Anyways, thought i would share that with y'all. :) Have a good week!
*********
I had taken dean and elliot to the Indian burial mounds for a walk. We first stopped off at a smaller a set of mounds near the entrance of the park. After we went there I told the boys that I have another place that I wanted to take them. You see another part of the park was so cool and had an old lake that was slowly growing in with plants… there were cranes and other cool birds there. So we loaded up into the car and drove to the other side of the park. We got out of the car and started to walk up a set of stairs leading to the lake and other mounds. As we walked up the stairs we got to a point where we could continue to go up the mound or turn left and go down the mound to the lake. I started down the stairs towards the lake and called Dean to follow me.
“No Nnena. I want to go up the mound.”
“But Dean you have already been up a mound before I want to show you something new.”
“NO NNENA!”
“I don’t want to go there! You follow ME! YOU go where I am going!”
Really little boy? I am suppossed to follow you? Really? He was so frustrated and nothing I could tell him would get him to understand that I had another, cooler place to show him. And the place that he wanted to go was the same but I had something new, a new adventure.
“No dean we are going this way I want to show you something.” Dean started to pitch a fit.
“No I don’t want to. I don’t want to.”
“Dean follow me.”
And elliot and I started down the path heading to the water. The same water that dean earlier wanted to go to that had the cool birds and all sort of stuff. Dean reluctantly followed us. I had so much more for Dean to see… and Dean simply wanted to go up the mound. And not that it was wrong but there was so much more that I wanted him to see. I knew that it was cool around the lake and I wanted dean to see it. We would eventually go up the mound. And I even told Dean this… we will eventually go up the mound but just follow me, come see this, I promise we will go back.
So he followed. Dragging his heels. Actually he was almost a 100 yards behind me. And then elliot and I discovered a cool hole where snakes might have lived. (Looking back I am glad no snakes lived in the hole) And we started playing with it…. and dean slowly started following us. And then a huge white crane flew off and dean stood watching the bird.
“Look nnena look.”
“I see it dean.”
And then he came over to join us and played in the hole. And then we started walking around the lake the same lake that he would not come to earlier because he wanted to go up the mound.
And we started having all sort of adventures. Something was following us in the bushes…oh my goodness! :) And we went stomping about and gradually Dean forgot that he wanted to go up the mound. Finally it was time to start heading back.
“Ok dean do you want to climb up the mound. Yes? Ok let’s go.” And I let him race ahead of me and he climbed to the top of the mound while elliot and I followed. We got to the top and could see everything, the city, the lake we were walking around and it was wonderful and glorious and yeah great.
Dean didn’t trust me… but finally curiosity brought him to see what I was doing. And then he followed me. As everything was going on I started thinking in my head about our conversation… actually a lot of texts took place during the struggle between Dean and me. And I couldn’t help but see the similarities. Dean had what he wanted, a desire, but I wanted to show him something else something more. I guess that is where the faith is… do I really believe that you have something more for me God? Some thing better and good. Recently the idea that God has been tossing around this week is his sovereignty. Sara e-mailed me yesterday about how awesome and comforting it was that he is sovereign… and the thing we talked about that the God who loves us is sovereign and in control. And he is a loving Father who sees more than we see. That doesn’t stop us from being frustrated or hurt when he thwarts our desire… but do I believe him to still be good? And if I do what does that mean about the events surrounding me, the no’s that hurt. The people that reject… is that somehow good too?
The hardest thing about my walk has been trusting God with my heart… what if He disappoints me? I am always impressed with people who trust God and get hurt but at least try. At least you try…and I think there is faith in that.
*****
Anyways, thought i would share that with y'all. :) Have a good week!
Monday, November 12, 2007
Double duty
So I have been cheating... I have been posting on my blog instead of this one. Sorry for the unfaithfulness. :)
But here is something from my blog... random thoughts of sorts.
So last weekend we got into this discussion of the 'self'. And how until modern times there was not a concept of self. There was almost a lack of awareness of self. And we talked about how here in America we are so focused on me, I the self... and are we miserable because of it.When I read my friends blog and I think about my own life I am miserable when I focus on self. We keep looking for this balance between 'loving myself' and not being consumed by self, and knowing thy self... is that the right focus? And honestly no one seems to be happy... no one seems to have hit on the right balance. Those who 'love' their selves seem no happier than those who hate self. But when we lose ourselves for something greater life has more meaning. Why else would people die of their country or other people because there is something greater and richer than living life for just me. Somewhere inside of us we are tuned to truly be happy when we are not the center of our worlds.
Yesterday in Bible study we started talking about community (in relation to our sin being communal not just individual). And Janeen brought up the point that community is so much bigger than just our group of people, or our nation, that maybe the community is the whole world (when you take it to the logical end). And we talked about that when we are focused on the good of the community serving one and other naturally 'we' are taken care of because we are all focused on our actions being for the good of the community and other people act based on how it will effect us. Hum it reminds me of so many things... 'look out not only for your own interest." "they will know you are mine by the love you have for one and another". The list goes on and on.
I used to fight against my parents and their worry and concern of the community. "Nnena don't you know that the other kids are looking up to you." "Don't you know your sisters will follow you in what you do?" And I used to fight against it, let me be my own person, let me do what I want, stop stiflingly me. They were trying to engrain in me this idea that my actions affect others, so act carefully knowing that other are watching.
But here is something from my blog... random thoughts of sorts.
So last weekend we got into this discussion of the 'self'. And how until modern times there was not a concept of self. There was almost a lack of awareness of self. And we talked about how here in America we are so focused on me, I the self... and are we miserable because of it.When I read my friends blog and I think about my own life I am miserable when I focus on self. We keep looking for this balance between 'loving myself' and not being consumed by self, and knowing thy self... is that the right focus? And honestly no one seems to be happy... no one seems to have hit on the right balance. Those who 'love' their selves seem no happier than those who hate self. But when we lose ourselves for something greater life has more meaning. Why else would people die of their country or other people because there is something greater and richer than living life for just me. Somewhere inside of us we are tuned to truly be happy when we are not the center of our worlds.
Yesterday in Bible study we started talking about community (in relation to our sin being communal not just individual). And Janeen brought up the point that community is so much bigger than just our group of people, or our nation, that maybe the community is the whole world (when you take it to the logical end). And we talked about that when we are focused on the good of the community serving one and other naturally 'we' are taken care of because we are all focused on our actions being for the good of the community and other people act based on how it will effect us. Hum it reminds me of so many things... 'look out not only for your own interest." "they will know you are mine by the love you have for one and another". The list goes on and on.
I used to fight against my parents and their worry and concern of the community. "Nnena don't you know that the other kids are looking up to you." "Don't you know your sisters will follow you in what you do?" And I used to fight against it, let me be my own person, let me do what I want, stop stiflingly me. They were trying to engrain in me this idea that my actions affect others, so act carefully knowing that other are watching.
Sunday, November 04, 2007
Let that be enough
...be content with what you have, for he has said, "I will never leave you nor forsake you." So we can confidently say,
"The Lord is my helper;
I will not fear;
what can man do to me?"
-Hebrews 13:5-6
So it hit me today what's been wrong with me. I've been buying into some deep-seated, subtle, and deadly lies.
I've believed the lie that there is anything I need other than Jesus. I've felt that if I could just have this, or that, or her, I'd be happy. Sometimes that isn't Christ's way. Sometimes the "right" thing isn't supposed to happen, isn't really right. Sometimes the road we are given to walk is broken. Sometimes all you get out of following Jesus is...Jesus. God has been teaching me this, and I've been slowly letting it become a part of me. I've been grudgingly dealing with it-sort of accepting that Jesus is, in some theoretical sense, enough, while stubbornly refusing to be happy unless I get what I want.
Today I'm trying to take it a step further. Today I'm walking away from the lie that Jesus is only enough for me to limp through life, die, and let everything get better. I am walking towards the truth that Jesus is also enough for me to be whole. For me to be fulfilled. For life to be satisfying. I want to move past acknowledging that Christ is all I need, and refusing to be happy unless I have more. I want to run screaming into the truth that Christ is happiness. Don't get me wrong; this world is not my home, I don't belong here, and I will never be completely at peace until I am with Christ in Heaven. Still, I'm embracing the idea that even now, Christ is with me on earth. And that changes everything.
Those of you who have walked through life with me over the past year or so know that these lessons were not easy, and those of you who are still walking beside me know that I continue to struggle with them. I haven't mastered them yet, but today, I am acknowledging that they are true, and I am choosing to walk forward in them. This world has torn my heart out, and sometimes I wish it would stay out, and I could just be numb. But we were not made for anesthesia; we were made for life-joy, pain, and all. So I am going to trust Jesus, who paid for my joy with His pain. I am going to trust Him with my heart, with my friends, and with my family. And one day, I will look back on this twisted road, and realize that it was straight. I will realize that it was exactly what God wanted for me. And one day I will realize that what God wanted was best. I love ya'll, and I pray this for you as well. God bless you,
Doug
Let me know that you hear me/Let me know your touch/Let me know that you love me/And let that be enough
-J. Foreman
"The Lord is my helper;
I will not fear;
what can man do to me?"
-Hebrews 13:5-6
So it hit me today what's been wrong with me. I've been buying into some deep-seated, subtle, and deadly lies.
I've believed the lie that there is anything I need other than Jesus. I've felt that if I could just have this, or that, or her, I'd be happy. Sometimes that isn't Christ's way. Sometimes the "right" thing isn't supposed to happen, isn't really right. Sometimes the road we are given to walk is broken. Sometimes all you get out of following Jesus is...Jesus. God has been teaching me this, and I've been slowly letting it become a part of me. I've been grudgingly dealing with it-sort of accepting that Jesus is, in some theoretical sense, enough, while stubbornly refusing to be happy unless I get what I want.
Today I'm trying to take it a step further. Today I'm walking away from the lie that Jesus is only enough for me to limp through life, die, and let everything get better. I am walking towards the truth that Jesus is also enough for me to be whole. For me to be fulfilled. For life to be satisfying. I want to move past acknowledging that Christ is all I need, and refusing to be happy unless I have more. I want to run screaming into the truth that Christ is happiness. Don't get me wrong; this world is not my home, I don't belong here, and I will never be completely at peace until I am with Christ in Heaven. Still, I'm embracing the idea that even now, Christ is with me on earth. And that changes everything.
Those of you who have walked through life with me over the past year or so know that these lessons were not easy, and those of you who are still walking beside me know that I continue to struggle with them. I haven't mastered them yet, but today, I am acknowledging that they are true, and I am choosing to walk forward in them. This world has torn my heart out, and sometimes I wish it would stay out, and I could just be numb. But we were not made for anesthesia; we were made for life-joy, pain, and all. So I am going to trust Jesus, who paid for my joy with His pain. I am going to trust Him with my heart, with my friends, and with my family. And one day, I will look back on this twisted road, and realize that it was straight. I will realize that it was exactly what God wanted for me. And one day I will realize that what God wanted was best. I love ya'll, and I pray this for you as well. God bless you,
Doug
Let me know that you hear me/Let me know your touch/Let me know that you love me/And let that be enough
-J. Foreman
Tuesday, October 30, 2007
Still Blogging.
Hi there. I haven't abandoned the act of blogging. I'm still finishing up some thoughts on the blog I kept this summer in Germany. If you'd like to check it out, you can find it here. I will return to blogging on the Logos site soon.
--Derik
--Derik
Thursday, October 18, 2007
brokenness
I'm trying to write a blog about the journey God has me on, and that will be up here soon, but in the mean time, know the journey has involved a good deal of brokenness, and it's been hard letting go of all the illusions of control I had built for myself. There's a blog I like to read called To Write Love on Her Arms. I often head there when I'm discouraged or weary. These quotes were there:
You can't control what breaks, but you can control the kind of person you're becoming. Hard hearts that transform into hearts that beat for the things that God's heart beats for.
Jesus says 'Follow me' and He doesn't say much more.
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